To Live Again Read online

  To Live Again

  The Living Series, Book 1

  By

  Melody Dawn

  TO LIVE AGAIN

  Copyright © 2015 Melody Dawn

  All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form, including electronic or mechanical, without written permission from the publisher, except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles or reviews.

  This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, businesses, places, events, and incidents are either the products of the author’s imagination or used in a fictitious manner. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, or actual events is purely coincidental.

  This book is licensed for your personal enjoyment only. This book may not be re-sold or given away to other people.

  If you would like to share this book with another person, please purchase an additional copy for each recipient. If you are reading this book and did not purchase it, or it was not purchased for your use only, then please return to your favorite eBook retailer and purchase your own copy. Thank you for respecting the hard work of this author.

  Table of Contents

  Table of Contents

  Acknowledgement

  Prologue

  Chapter One

  Chapter Two

  Chapter Three

  Chapter Four

  Chapter Five

  Chapter Six

  Chapter Seven

  Chapter Eight

  Chapter Nine

  Chapter Ten

  Chapter Eleven

  Chapter Twelve

  Chapter Thirteen

  Chapter Fourteen

  Chapter Fifteen

  Chapter Sixteen

  Chapter Seventeen

  Chapter Eighteen

  Chapter Nineteen

  Chapter Twenty

  Chapter Twenty-One

  Chapter Twenty-Two

  Chapter Twenty-Three

  Chapter Twenty-Four

  Chapter Twenty-Five

  Chapter Twenty-Six

  Chapter Twenty-Seven

  Chapter Twenty-Eight

  Chapter Twenty-Nine

  Chapter Thirty

  Chapter Thirty-One

  Chapter Thirty-Two

  Chapter Thirty-Three

  Chapter Thirty-Four

  Chapter Thirty-Five

  Chapter Thirty-Six

  Chapter Thirty-Seven

  Chapter Thirty-Eight

  Chapter Thirty-Nine

  Chapter Forty

  Chapter Forty-One

  Chapter Forty-Two

  Chapter Forty-Three

  Chapter Forty-Four

  Chapter Forty-Five

  Chapter Forty-Six

  Chapter Forty-Seven

  Epilogue-Chloe

  Epilogue-Jayson

  A Note from the Author

  Spotify Playlist

  Author Links

  Acknowledgement

  There are so many people that I want to thank for helping make my dream a reality.

  I want to thank God for always being there for me.

  Marisa-Rose Shor with Cover Me, Darling

  Samantha Wiley with Proofreading By the Page

  Maria Lazarou with Obsessive Pimpettes

  To my beta readers: Y’all are amazing and I couldn’t have done it without you.

  To all of Melody’s Hot Chicks…my amazing street team

  To Anna Zaires, Stephanie Rose, RJ Thompson, Marquita Valentine, Lacey Black, and too many more to name, you lead by example and I’m a better writer for having y’all as inspiration.

  To Crystal Snyder, Lisa McCullough, and Tammy Markowski, y’all are my original chickies and hold a special place in my heart.

  To Michelle Horst for giving me a push to get going on writing To Live Again and all the help you’ve given me during the process.

  Tammy Markowski-Chapter 21 wouldn’t be here except for your help

  Crystal Snyder-You knew exactly what to do in Chapter 47

  To Crystal Snyder…my #1 cheerleader, my brainstorming partner, my teaser maker, my freaking amazing PA, my twinkie ESP buddy, but mainly to my best friend, I dedicate this book to you, because without you, it wouldn’t exist. I not only gained a valuable asset when you entered my beta group, but I gained a friend that I will treasure for many years to come. Thank you for being there for me, listening to me gripe, and always picking me up when I was down.

  Finally, to my husband…my very own “Jayson,”…twenty years ago you walked into my life and I fell for you with one look. I knew you were my soulmate and now twenty years later, you are still my lover, my best friend; and most of all, my reason for living.

  OK, I’m going to stop now! If I’ve missed anyone, please know that everything you have done is greatly appreciated.

  With love,

  Melody Dawn

  Prologue

  Three years ago…

  All around me I hear noise…nothing but excruciating earsplitting noise. It’s so loud that it pierces my ears and I just want it to stop. I hear my radio blaring, my horn continuously honking, sirens, and human screams. Out of everything, the screaming is the worst. I’m not sure where it is coming from, but it sounds like someone is in both physical and mental anguish. This has to be a dream; no, a nightmare. Maybe if I don’t open my eyes it will all disappear and I will wake from the worst dream I’ve ever had.

  Suddenly, agonizing pain rolls through my body and there’s a metallic smell all around me. The pain is unbearable and the smell is making me nauseous. I began to pray, begging God to please let this nightmare end. When it doesn’t happen, I know this is no dream, so I slowly open my eyes, still with the hope I might be wrong.

  My eyes open slowly and the first thing I see is the clock on my dash; it says 5:48 a.m. I can’t understand why I’m in my car at this time of morning. I try to move, but I am locked into place by my seatbelt and I can’t move my left arm to get it undone. I reach over with my good hand and shut off my radio; the noise from it is making my head pound mercilessly. I wish my horn would stop honking, but it seems like one never-ending sound. As I look down at my useless and painful arm, I realize that I must be involved in a car accident. I think I hit my head as well because my mind is having trouble processing what is happening to me

  The next thing I know, there is a police officer and a paramedic at my door talking to me. I try to roll down my window, but it won’t move. I hear them telling me to hold on and that they will get me out. Knowing that I’m trapped in my car terrifies me; what if it catches on fire? While I wait for them to rescue me, I wonder who hit me and how badly I’m hurt. Within what seems like no time at all, the firefighters on the scene have my door completely off of my car and the paramedics are talking to me. I feel like I am underwater right now. I can hear people talking to me, but it’s just white noise; nothing is making any sense.

  One of the paramedics is telling me that they need to put me on a backboard to make sure I don’t have any damage to my back or neck. Except to look at him, I don’t respond, but they strap me down anyway and take me to the ambulance. Once I’m in there, he hooks me up to various machines that take my vital signs and another medic starts an IV on me. I’m still in such a fog that I barely feel the needle stick nor does it register that there is also a policeman sitting on the bench seat next to my stretcher.

  Staring coldly at me, he asks what I’ve had to drink or what drugs I’ve ingested tonight. Both he and the paramedic are looking at me waiting for a response and it hits me: something is very wrong and I am in trouble. I try to tell them both that I went to Castaway’s on the beach with my friends and an ex-boyfriend after our graduation ceremony. I tell them I had one drink, but only finished half of it. I can te
ll they don’t believe me and the policeman tells the paramedic to preserve one of the vials of my blood for testing.

  His words cause a chill to run through me and I feel tears streaking down my face. The paramedic looks at me with compassion, but the policeman is looking at me like I’m a murderer. I try to sit up and tell them that they have it wrong; I’m not drunk and I haven’t taken any drugs.

  Instead of listening to me, the police officer says, “Save it; I’ve heard it all before.”

  I begin to cry in earnest and he says, “By driving drunk, you have injured two people and a baby is dead!”

  He says these words with such venom that I shrink back. His words finally penetrate my brain and it repeats over and over in my head, “a baby is dead.” I hear screaming and the sound is so tortured that my heart hurts for that person. The paramedic rushes to me and injects something into my IV…right before I fade off into oblivion; it dawns on me that the screaming is coming from me.

  The first week in the hospital is a blur to me. I remember more screaming and nurses injecting me with medication that kept me sedated. As they weaned me off of the medication, the daily visits increased from both the chaplain and a social worker assigned to me by the hospital. I still don’t have a clear picture of what happened to me that night or to the people who were also involved in the accident. I want to ask, but I don’t know if I can handle hearing it. I still hear the policeman’s voice telling me that I killed a baby and the tears start falling all over again.

  My visit today is from Laurie, my assigned social worker. I cling to her like she is my own mother. And I think she lets me because my own mother and father have yet to come and visit me in the hospital or even call to see how I am doing. Laurie walks in the door and the look on her face is not good.

  She comes to my bed and says, “Chloe, we need to talk about the night of the accident.” I start shaking my head no and she sighs. “You don’t have a choice…a detective is here to speak with you unless you are physically unable to do so.”

  I feel nauseous, but I know sooner or later, I have to talk about it. I tell Laurie ok and she goes out into the hall where I assume the detective is waiting. An older man about my father’s age comes in and introduces himself as Detective Michael Snyder with the San Diego Police Department. He has a kind face and I hope that means he will help me, but I don’t know what he wants and it scares me. Panic runs through my body and I can’t stop the shaking that starts; I also can’t hide it because the bed moves as I shake.

  Laurie sits next to me and holds my hand while looking like a mother protecting her baby. Detective Snyder asks me to tell him what I remember about the night of the accident. When I first came to the hospital, I couldn’t remember anything, but now the details are clear because I dream about it every night. I tell the detective that it was my high school graduation and some friends and I went to Castaways, a bar on the beach, after the ceremony.

  He stops me at that point and asks, “You do know that the legal drinking age in California is 21 and the bouncers ID people as they come in the door?”

  I have the grace to blush, but I keep on with my story. This is what I remember…I can’t believe I found a place to park near the front door. The parking lot of Castaways is packed and I’m not in the mood to slog down the beach in 3 inch heels. My best friend Eden is with me along with Brandon Turner, for what reason God only knows. I try to ask her and she just shrugs and moves closer to Brandon as we get in line. I really hope we get picked to get in quickly because I am already tired. I don’t know what is wrong with me tonight; I just graduated from high school. My life is about to start when I go off to college in Boston at the end of the summer; I should be freaking thrilled!

  Before I can dwell on it too much, I feel a pair of hands go around my waist and I am pulled back towards a chest….a familiar chest and not one that I am happy to be near. I turn around quickly and see my very ex-boyfriend, Daniel Latham. I just stare at him and he takes this as I am not going to put up a fight about seeing him. Wow, he is definitely wrong!

  “What the freaking hell, Daniel? Why are your hands on me; why are you even near me?”

  The face that I thought was so handsome and that I might have loved turns dark and nasty, just like I knew it would. He is a bastard and even worse, he is a physically abusive bastard. I look at Eden and Brandon who don’t even have the balls to look at me directly and I know they are a part of this

  Eden can’t accept that Daniel and I are over…even after I told her what he had done to me. This put a strain on our friendship, but I was hoping that for tonight as we celebrated, we could put it behind us. It looks like I am wrong and I am so livid, I feel like I have steam coming out of my ears.

  I tell Eden, “I can’t believe you would do this to me on tonight of all nights! What is wrong with you?”

  She tears up and says, “I was hoping we could just all hang out one last time. I am leaving at the end of the week for Paris to stay with my grandmother.”

  Eden is going to be attending Le Cordon Bleu in Paris, but I thought she would be leaving at the end of the summer just like the rest of us. This puts a damper on my anger and I tell her,

  “It’s fine, but I don’t want to talk to him so please don’t think this is a way to try and get us back together. He gave up that right when he punched me in the stomach. I will never trust him again and I don’t want to be around him.”

  Eden agrees and evidently God suddenly felt sorry for me because the bouncer tagged us to go inside. Thank goodness! Now I can get away from Daniel. Once we are in the club, Eden and I move around talking to some of our friends that also came out tonight.

  After dancing and talking for what seemed like forever, I am so thirsty. I make my way up to the bar and what a sight the bartender is!

  He is gorgeous and as I am standing there gawking at him, a girl next to me says, “He’s gay, honey.”

  I can believe it, all the good ones seem to be gay or already taken. But, I can still look at him, right? I’m waiting my turn to order when guess who shows up. Yeah, it’s my abusive douchebag ex-boyfriend…the one who can’t seem to take a hint. I should have called the police on his ass when he hit me.

  The events of that night come to mind and now I’m really pissed. Daniel and I were what I called dating except we never went anywhere. He always wanted to hang out at my house, something I thought was odd; but I was too happy to have a boyfriend to call him on it. After six months of him coming over for dinner, watching movies in our home theater, and him constantly talking to my dad, he decided it was his proverbial right to sleep with me. We had repeated conversations about this and I told him that I wanted to wait for marriage or at least wait until I was engaged. I still feel the same way. I want it to mean something. I don’t want to just fuck someone because my hormones are in overdrive or because it’s what all our friends are doing.

  Our fight that night was of epic proportions. He screamed at me that he had put his time in with the ice princess and her family and now he was going to get something in return. I realized then and there he had been coming over to my parents’ house to get in good with them with the hopes of us having some kind of modern day arranged marriage. Can we say certifiable?

  I felt like throwing up and I screamed at him that his plan failed and it was never going to happen! Guess I should have kept my mouth shut because it ended with him punching me in the stomach. The punch knocked the breath from me and I clutched my stomach in shock while he screamed that I made him do it. What bullshit!

  Daniel looks at me with his puppy dog eyes that once could make me do almost anything for him.

  He says, “Let me buy you a drink and then I will leave you alone for good.”

  I know how determined he can be so I agree to one drink and then we go our separate ways forever. He comes back with a Long Island Iced Tea, which he knows I like. Then he tells me that he is heading out for the night, which is weird because Daniel likes to be the center of atte
ntion. I should have known right then he would never leave without some ulterior motive. I finish about half of my drink and stand there people watching. I decide I’m just not feeling it tonight so I find my way to Eden and tell her I am going home.

  As I’m walking to my car, a wave of dizziness washes over me, and I think that the drink must have been more potent than usual. It takes forever for me to get my car unlocked because I feel so uncoordinated and sleepy. I know I can’t drive like this so I call my mom and ask her to come and pick me up. She is not happy, but says she will be there as soon as she can. The next thing I remember is a lot of noise and being in a world of pain.

  . At this point, I come back from my memories and both Laurie and Detective Snyder are looking at me with pity. Then the detective drops a bomb of information on me that I will never recover from. He tells me that my blood sample contained GHB also known as the date rape drug. He says this is why I can’t remember anything about the accident. I feel so sick to my stomach because I know exactly who did this to me…Daniel Latham…all because he can’t stand rejection. The tears fall and I try to tell the detective who the bastard is that did it, but he tells me right away that they have camera footage showing Daniel putting something in my drink. For his actions, he has been arrested and is in the county jail awaiting arraignment; evidently his parents are distancing themselves, too.

  I tell the detective that I can’t understand why I was driving because I called my mother to come and get me. He says that he has confirmed that with my cell phone records as well as my mother. The next thing he says shatters my world. He tells me that according to my mother, she called me back, and said once I sobered up to drive home because my dad didn’t want her getting out so late to come and get me. I can’t believe that they would do this to me and now I know why they haven’t been to the hospital to see me. Evidently, in my drugged brain, I decided to drive home after she called me back.

  I finally get up the courage to ask about the other people in the wreck. Laurie looks at me like she is worried I am going to regress into screaming again and Detective Snyder looks slightly sick. He tells me that there were three people in the other car: a couple and their baby. I beg him to tell me their names and he tries to say no, but then says that I will find out sooner or later. According to Snyder, the couple’s names are Ethan and Cheyenne Sterling. Next, he tells me that Ethan Sterling is paralyzed from the waist down and Cheyenne Sterling had to have one of her legs partially amputated because her tibia and fibula was crushed irreparably in the accident. Finally, he goes on to say the words that I know by heart. Their 6 month old baby, Alex, was killed upon impact.